Not all friends should be divided into "useful" and "useless".
A Lin was having midnight snacks downstairs with me some time ago, and before his ass was hot, he told me that he had been busy with the entrepreneurial team recently, and this was the first time he had come out to meet with his former friends since the holiday.
I laughed and teased him: "Big Boss takes time out of his busy schedule to have midnight snacks with me. Let me wipe away my tears first."
he hammered me and told me not to be poor, and after a while he suddenly said, "although I am very busy, I am not too busy to have any time, but apart from you, I have no interest in meeting with the Gang of five."
the Gang of five was a small group when Arin and four other friends and I were in high school. At that time, we were bored with each other every day, and we were very affectionate when we went to school and had a holiday.
when we graduated, many students were grieving and sighing parting, but we had no feeling at all, because at that time we firmly believed that no matter where we went, the five of us would always be in love with each other and be each other's best friends.
results two or three years after graduation, our faces began to be slowly swollen by ourselves, because everyone found that now we only get together symbolically every holiday. I can never get back to the feeling that I wanted to meet each other from the bottom of my heart.
"I don't know why I feel more and more that meeting them has become a kind of" useless socializing "." Alin added a sentence and pulled me out immersed in the memories.
I am a little unhappy, but I can't find anything to refute Arin, because that seems to be the case.
except for Arlin and me, the other three people did not go to college. One went back to inherit the family business as a boss, one worked hard for a career, and the other just retired from the army and has nothing to do at present.
our lives are getting farther and farther away from each other, and gradually we can no longer understand each other's lives, so there is no way to have a good chat and talk about something "useful" at every party.
they don't know the new media I'm worried about, nor do they understand the seed wheel that Lin has a headache, so every time we sit down, we can only switch between memories, feelings, and games in turn, and finally start Arena of Valor or go online to play a few rounds of lol.
because only then can we find the feeling of happiness, so that everyone can feel that we never seem to have changed.
after I got home that night, I lay in bed and thought for a long time what kind of person could be a friend.
I always remember that when I was in junior high school, I did not go to school in the urban area, but went to an aristocratic school where the school spirit was not so good. Most of the students in the school were the second generation of the traditional Chaoshan Factory, and they generally attached less importance to their studies. Because after graduation, they will be called to try to do business, and go to junior high school, just to complete the nine-year compulsory education.
at that time, the one who played best with me was Heizi. He was a man of great leadership temperament, and everyone liked to revolve around him.
when I was hanging out with them, I tried to be a "bad student" for the first time, such as deliberately messing with a teacher I didn't like in class, smoking in the toilet after class and going out to play with the three-meter-high outer wall of the school during the evening class.
or, a group of people secretly went to beat up the idiot who bullied the girl I loved.
We live a similar life day after day, and the teacher can neither control nor want to control it. For some reason, we are all the last teachers and students of that school.
later, I don't know from which day, sunspots and they gradually alienated from me. In the evening class, as long as I am not careful when I am doing exercises, they will sneak out of the classroom under my nose; during class time, they simply lie on their desks and fall asleep, instead of teasing the teacher as usual, or even not talking to me one by one.
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after this kind of life has been going on for some time, I can't help but run and ask Heizi, "Brother, why does everyone seem to isolate me on purpose?"
"then I'll pick it out for you. I called it." Heizi looked me in the eye for a long time and finally said, "you are the one who can be admitted to high school, unlike all of us."
"Brothers can still do it, of course, but we don't want to fool you around and can't help you, but I know at least we can't hold you back."
as soon as I was about to refute something, sunspot's words came out of my mouth, as if they were prepared in advance.
although it has been many years since I graduated from junior high school, I still find a time to get together with sunspots every time I go home.
Heizi is not a scholar, nor does he read books. His biggest hobby is playing mahjong. The only thing I can learn with him may be gambling skills, which is of no use to me, but that doesn't prevent me from missing him and socializing with him.
because I think that sunspot is the seal of my youth, he always accompanies me in his own way and establishes a special relationship with me.
if it hadn't been for him, I might not have been who I am now, so I never thought about whether the relationship was "useful" or not.
those arguments that preach "giving up useless socializing" make me shudder.
what's the difference between a cold machine and a cold machine when you first judge in your mind whether he is valuable to yourself when you interact with everyone when your feelings can be quantified?
if you have to quantify your feelings, is it useless to fall in love and get married? After all, objectively speaking, it is a "waste of time".
the popularity of these ideas has made many people tremble for fear of wasting their precious time in useless social interaction, such as catching a serious disease. instead of classifying our social objects as "useful" and "useless", I prefer to use "utilitarian social" and "compassionate social" instead.
it is good to have "utilitarian socialization" with friends who can make progress or exchange value with them, but you should know that "empathy and socialization" is also an emotional need and the meaning of human body temperature.
I have always believed that some feelings are used to waste time.
even if I just sit together and talk about innocuous topics and spend the whole afternoon in exchange for a moment of joy and peace in my troubled life, that's enough.
there are things that only certain people can do, such as reminding me of who I used to be, like making me laugh from the bottom of my heart.
even if you are neither talented nor promising, because of you, it is priceless to me.
if I say you are useful, you are useful. Good night.