The pseudonym "Zhang Thorn" once made many people think that I was a girl.

/March 2023

I once heard my mother say that if my grandfather was still alive, my name would be "jiawei".

but what I can imagine is that if I were really called "jiawei", my life would be completely different now.

I may gain five more friends who have played since childhood because of the repeated names of other "jiawei" in my class, or I may inexplicably increase my affection for each other because of a girl's name "jiaxin".

finally, a child named "zihao" was born.

in fact, the above plot is reflected in Eason Chan's "Zhang's Love Song". If you are really interested, you can listen to that song.

but these are all my random thoughts, because my name is not "Jiawei", and my grandfather has never met me.

back to the point, my name is jingji.

I just know that my father's expectation of me has always been health.

the above sentence is what my father said at that time.

and they tend to ignore this.

everyone says that when people reach the age of 15 or 16, they will usher in puberty.

I think maybe my rebellious period is later than the others, because I didn't really "rebel" until I was in high school.

changed from "jingji" to "thorns".

Don't underestimate this Weibo name, it has also attracted a lot of opposition.

"Why do you call yourself 'thorns'? it looks like it's hard for you to walk in life."

but later, "good luck" did not bring me good luck:

so I changed "good luck" to "thorns".


in fact, when I first started to write cluttered, my pen name was "jimgee Z." the reason for this pretending name was entirely because of Guo Jingming.

and one of the directions of discussion is the English name that Guo Jingming signed in the film: Jingming Guo.

one of them is the literal translation of names into English instead of pinyin, and surnames with capital letters plus'. The "advanced" usage of "Jimgee Z." The origin of this pseudonym.

people always have to do a lot of details to maintain their momentum in difficult times.

but I still put "Jimgee Z." Changed back to "Zhang Thorn".

I said, "that's my English name, it doesn't mean anything else."

my girlfriend is like this. people who are familiar with her will not describe her as "smart", but at some point, she can always offer crucial insights.

"Oh, is that your English name?"

"just a common English name."

so I changed the "mosaic English name" back to the Chinese name, "Zhang Jingshi".

but this is the detail of another story.

so I walked around, and my pseudonym used the "Zhang Jingshi" of the Weibo era.

but I encountered another dilemma.

I didn't say that it's a bad thing to be mistaken for a girl.

but I didn't force it any more. since people like to think of me as a woman, I'm a female writer.

it's just that, as you know, after we started posting pictures of ourselves occasionally, the view that "the thorn is a girl" broke down.

I think it also has something to do with the image association brought by "thorns".

because it's so funny, not only am I not thin and I don't wear a white shirt, but even in the early years, I didn't even wear glasses (later, I had to wear them at work because of severe astigmatism).

but I don't mind, because I also regard it as a gift from the name.

since life makes life difficult for me, I will choose a more difficult name to fight against fate.

of course I know that it is just a pseudonym, and in essence, it should not have the possibility of becoming a comrade-in-arms.

what's more, I won't be remembered because my name is so random.

so, on this inexplicable, just finished work Wednesday night, I want to take advantage of the coolness of Lijiang in Yunnan to tell you one thing, that is:

because this creature, once pretending to find meaning, there is a chance to follow it and find real meaning in order to confront those difficult times.

that's all for today.